Analysis Paralysis

July 13, 2007

Analysis paralysis is that phenomenon where there’s a decision to be made or a project to be done but we get caught up in the process of meeting, discussing, brainstorming, and tweaking.  There are always more studies to be conducted, more reports to be written and read and more statistics to be collected and reviewed.As a result, we’re very busy but nothing actually gets done.

Recently, this happened with my husband and me.  Our house is old and in need of many different renovations.  Over the past year, we have slowly been collecting estimates and deciding what we want done in each area.  I realized last week that we are halfway through the summer (how did that happen?) and we were about to miss yet another season of being able to enjoy a new deck/front porch/sunroom/garage/bathroom/driveway.  I also realized that unless we made a conscious decision to pick one of the projects we would stay in the estimate-collecting phase and never move on to the next one.

We sat down for the discussion.  The husband began the talk with a detailed description of all the projects that needed doing, providing detailed flowcharts and analysis of return on investment.  I lovingly responded with “Shut up!  Pardon me for interrupting, Darling, but today we just need to make a decision on which project.”  We did make a decision and after that all subsequent decisions became easier.

How to control analysis paralysis: 

1.   Set deadlines.  Time limits should exist.  This way you have a framework for the amount of time a task should take and you reduce the chances that days, weeks and months will pass without some action. 

2.   Ask for help.  Everyone has weaknesses.  If you suspect this is one of yours, ask a trusted friend, family member or colleague for help.

 3.   Narrow down your choices.  Too many choices can lead to overwhelm.  In our case, it was choosing among six projects.  We narrowed it down and eliminated choices by asking ourselves: What can we afford (this was the big one).  Which project is the least disruptive (important for my home-based business).  Which would give us the greatest pleasure (I immediately ruled out the driveway). 

4.   Set priorities for decision-making.  What decisions have to be made and what can be tweaked later on.  For our renovations, we merely had to decide on a project.  Things like light fixtures, paint colours and flooring can all be decided on later. 

5.   Do one thing.  “Just Do It!” works as a catchphrase because it’s true.  Doing one thing will give you momentum to do another.

6.   Feeling anxious?  Re-frame that feeling as excitement.  The physiological symptoms of anxiety and excitement are the same: perspiring, increased heart rate, butterflies in the stomach.  If you’re going to be experiencing those symptoms anyways, you may as well call them excitement and get a bit of enjoyment out of them. 

I’m proud to announce we decided to do our front porch.  Sure, I may have a pang of regret at the first snowfall when I’m scraping the car windows muttering to myself that we should have built a garage.  I’m confident that regret will be offset by the enjoyment I get this summer while sipping a martini lemonade on my new front porch.

Until the next chapter,Lisa

Creating Good Habits

June 25, 2007

 Often, when we think of a habit, we focus on our bad habits.  We lament that we watch too much television, drink, smoke or eat too much, spend too much money…and all the rest of those habits we consider “bad.”  You don’t need me to list them.  You know what they are.  I’m sure you could rattle off your bad habits in no time flat.  We’re all good at that. 

This type of thinking isn’t helpful at all.  All this does is encourage us to feel bad about ourselves.  It’s not serving you in any way. Let’s flip that thinking around and start to talk about good habits.  I bet if I asked you what they are you’d have a more difficult time listing them off for me.  I know you have some, though.  Brushing your teeth before bed?  Having enough (okay, some) fruits and veggies every day?  Hugging your kids once in a while? 

Now think about good habits you’d like to establish.  Adding flossing to the nightly tooth brushing routine?  Drinking more water?  Having a regular date with your partner?

 If some part of your life isn’t working, make a decision to add one good habit (rather than trying to break a bad habit).  Focus on what could be improved. 

þ     Get really clear on your motivation for building this habit.  Are you establishing a regular date with your partner because you want to improve your relationship or because you want to try new restaurants in the city?  Are you flossing because you want to improve your overall health or because you want to avoid having your dental hygienist give you the flossing lecture again?  Your reasons are personal but it’s important you know what they are.  When you feel your motivation dropping, you can remind yourself of why you’re doing this in the first place.

þ     Make a plan to establish the habit.  Decide when and how you’ll do it.  Maybe you need to make a standing date with your babysitter as well as your partner.  Maybe you need a checklist taped to the wall to tick off when you do your habit

þ     Be prepared to re-work your plan.  Be flexible about it.  We can’t anticipate every situation that could come up.  Your plan may fail.  That doesn’t mean you have failed.  Be prepared to adjust.

þ     Practice, practice, practice!  We get so skilled at our bad habits because they’re easy and we practice them a lot.  I practice not flossing nearly every day.  Good habits take practice too.  It is said that if you can perform a good habit consistently for 3 weeks then that habit is…well, it’s a habit.  It becomes routine.  You won’t have to try so hard anymore.

þ     Reward yourself.  It’s a tough job to establish a new habit.  Make sure you celebrate your success! 

Well, I’m off to floss.  I hate that lecture. 

Until the next chapter,Lisa

Creating a Great First Impression

June 13, 2007 

It is said that we have fewer than ten seconds to make a good first impression. We’ve all had a run-in at a gathering with that person who talks non-stop about himself while his eyes are darting over your shoulder looking for someone better to talk to.  Of course, we’re insulted that this person is keeping a roving eye out for a conversational partner superior to ourselves and we eventually reach the point where we’re ready to chew our own leg off rather than remain trapped with this bore.

Perhaps you’ve been this person?  I’m sure I have a time or two (I know a few people reading this right now are nodding your heads. Stop that!). By this point in our lives most of us have heard the tried and true tips to creating a good first impression: 

1. Dress appropriately for the occasion and make sure your clothes are clean and pressed
2. Offer a strong handshake – no “dead fish”
3. Brush your teeth – don’t force me to play CSI Miami as I try to identify what’s between your teeth
4. Maintain good eye contact without staring in a creepy way

 Ann Demarais and Valerie White offer additional tips in their book First Impressions: What you don’t know about how others see you. They write that there are four ways to focus when meeting someone for the first time:

 1.   How you feel about yourself

 2.   How you feel about the other person

 3.   How the other person feels about you

 4.   How the other person feels about himself or herself

 Most of us tend to focus on 1, 2 and 3.  We think about the fact that we’re tired or we wonder whether our deodorant has failed.  We hope the other person likes us and we try to figure out whether we like them. When engaging in any type of social interaction, we should always focus on how the other person feels about him or herself.  Our goal is to make that person feel better about him or herself after our conversation.

 Demarais and White write that we help people feel better about themselves by offering four universal social gifts:

 1.   Appreciation – everyone likes to feel appreciated. Let someone know that you appreciate their positive qualities

 2.   Connection – this is about finding out where you intersect with someone.  Do you have a mutual friend?  Common interests?  Similar experiences?  Common attitudes?  People like to feel connected because they feel understood and they feel a sense of belonging

 3.   Elevation – Everyone likes to be in good spirits and they are drawn to those that make them feel that way.  Smile, be playful, direct your attention to the positive elements in a situation

 4.   Enlightenment – We all like to learn something new: facts, ideas and perspectives. Notice things as you go through your day.  Did you just see a movie or read an interesting article?

 The key to these social gifts is balance.  Focusing on only one of these is off-putting to people.  Think of the person who is always “enlightening.”  You’d probably soon begin to perceive that person as a know-it-all. When we give these social gifts, we also receive them.  People like people who make them feel good about themselves.  People will be drawn to you and will give these same social gifts in return.

 Lastly, the Aboriginal people have a saying that the Creator gave you two ears and one mouth.  You should be listening twice as much as you speak. Everyone loves to be listened to and that’s probably the best social gift of all.

 Until the next chapter,Lisa 

The GEMO Principle

May 23, 2007 

I have to admit that I had a tough time deciding on a topic for today’s newsletter.  There are so many interesting subjects that I could write about but none of them were really “grabbing” me for some reason. As I spent more and more time trying to decide on a topic, I realized that I had succumbed to a principle in project management that my husband had told me about last week.  I had thought it would be a great topic for a newsletter and promptly wrote it on my ideas list and forgot about it.  So, after experiencing it myself, I decided it is today’s topic.

The GEMO Principle.  Good Enough, Move On.  

How many times in our lives do we set out to do a task only to spend way too much time on it because we’re trying to achieve perfection?  I had to write a research paper last month and found I had a hard time declaring it complete because there was always more I could do.  Points to be added, clarifications to be made, sentences to clean up.  I finally submitted it because it had come to the point where I had read it so many times it no longer made sense! 

The GEMO Principle states that we spend approximately 50% of our time to complete 98% of the work on a project.  We use the remaining 50% of our time on a task working on that last 2%.  This is where we’re trying to complete the task in a manner that is “just so.” We’re trying to get everything as perfect as possible.  This is the GEMO point.  It’s good enough, move on. The next time you’re stressing out over completing a task ask yourself whether you may have reached the GEMO point.  You may save yourself a lot of time and anxiety.

 Oh, and one other thing….on second thought, forget it.  GEMO. 

Until the next chapter,Lisa